I Want to Make Changes…But I Can’t.
Brains Like Patterns
Essentially, we as humans like consistency, therefore we know what to expect. Why? It is part of our evolutionary trait for our brains to look for patterns in the every day information we gather. It's a deeply rooted, foundational skill that is used to help keep us safe for survival. When our brain finds information about the people around us and the world, our brains are incredible at storing that memory and using it as a key part in our survival. This is called 'Pattern Recognition'. For example, if you placed your hand on a gas stove, you will instantly feel a hot and painful burn. Your brain stores that information for the next time you get near a gas stove and you quickly learn not to put your hand on it. You're now one step ahead in the survival game!
Because our brains like patterns, it will be a challenge to break away from current habits. You have to think differently and your brain doesn't like that. You have to consider new options and outcomes and that scares the your brain. It's no wonder so many people, take the same route to work, order the same meals, or shop at the same store for the same type of clothing.
Change Feels Scary
I say ‘feels’ because your brain experiences emotions before it goes down the logical route. Because our brain likes patterns, it craves a known outcome. If we veer off the path that we are used to taking, our brain senses something different and will signal an alarm to our 'Limbic System' or the emotional part of our brain.
Let's say we are at a job that is sucking the life out of us. You put in a lot of time, work, effort, and energy yet you are nowhere near where you want to be. Your boss isn't giving you a raise. No title change. The work culture is a negative, soul-sucking vampire. You get home and you don't look forward to going to sleep because you know you have to go back to that god awful place the very next day.
You want to make the change to switch jobs right? But what is your brain foreseeing that makes making a change feel scary? Let's go back to how our brain loves patterns. Even though this work scenario is not desired, our brain has created this consistent messaging or pattern that this is potentially how other jobs, bosses, and work culture may be. If that's the case, our brain will sense that as a threat and cling to what we already know is a for sure thing. Your current job and its ins and outs are so predictable that your brain finds comfort in even an unwanted circumstance. Thus, a change will not happen.
How can a Licensed Therapist in Los Angeles, California Help me?
By partnering together with me, we can hash out all the feared outcomes your brain is signaling to you when wanting to make that change. We can explore and process your limiting beliefs in a safe space. We play out scenarios and brainstorm what actual steps you can take in order to be in a more positive place. Let’s learn how you can regulate your emotions that are currently holding you back from the life you want to live. If it's anything like the job scenario I mentioned above, I believe that you have the power and the choice to make a decision that will bring more to your life. Schedule a consultation today.